Zwarte Honden, Holland's Most Mysterious and Deadly Combat Unit /

A nugget from Wonderglen’s annals:

This is the (fake) web site of a super-secret Dutch paramilitary group known as “Zwarte Honden.”

Here’s an excerpt, an interview with an anonymous member of Zwarte Honden named “Pomegranate”:

MG: How does one join this group?
Pomegranate: I don’t think you can join. I think the lead singer died of AIDS. They were great.
MG: Not Frankie Goes to Hollywood. Your group…
Pomegranate: Only the elite cream of the crops are considered, and you have to meet the 5-5-5 requirement.
MG:What is that?
Pomegranate:Speak five languages, practice 5 martial arts, and have killed five people in combat.. Or you can make up for a deficiency in one area by having a higher number in another category, so you can practice 10 martial arts and not have killed anyone in battle. You can’t speak zero languages, obviously. You can’t be somebody that can’t talk but has ten martial arts that has killed ten people. Most of the bilingual guys have killed a dozen people, and make up the rest in martial arts like Shin Se Do BJ-Jitsu, preying mantis Kung Fu, Escrima, and Thai Dog Style.

Here’s an audio interview with Pomegranate.

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